#23
February 25, 2003
From: V.

Hello, Just a note with bits and bites of my thoughts on your book.

Nicola might have passed on i posted on the AOL lesbian reading group
bulletin board that i really liked Solitaire. Anyhow, in no particular order,
here are some thoughts.

Hope you get the Nebula. And the Lammy.

oops spoiler here i guess,
The book didn't really kick in for me until the elevator attack. I stopped
reading at that point and had a deep breath. Then she gets the option of
going into VC and when she says 'I don't think i can be alone for eight
years', wow, i stopped there again. That's really where this book went BANG for me and then i was hooked lined and sinkered. The first part was mostly set up, but there were bits of Jackal and Snow that made me think they weren't going to be cut off. At least it made me pull for the characters to come out ok.

I noted how the story doesn't touch revenge or getting even. I didn't find it necessary, just somewhat unusual.

Jackal doesn't even get mad at her parents, at least not her father, nor
Neill, nor KO and it's so easy to hate some big corporation. But i guess the corporation in a way is home to her, it's where she went while in VC.

I thought the line where Snow tells Neil that Jackal loves him just stuck
out, didn't go anywhere. He's important but to use the word 'love' was a bit far.

'Love' is between Snow and Jackal. You had some lines there ( i can't recall them anymore) that really felt spot on for me. I know the book wasn't intended to be romantic, but there was a bit of it the way i read it.

Boy, do they drink a lot. <g>

What about a sequel? More, more.

Thanks for writing a thought provoking, heart rending read.

Please leave off my email if you post this on the virtual pint. Nice name
that.

Cheers, V.

I'm glad you liked it. Thanks for taking the time to share your response.

No Lammy for Solitaire. The nominations have been posted, and Solitaire is not among them (although Nicola's novel Stay has been nominated, which is a Very Fine Thing). Thanks for your kind wishes about the Nebula. Win or no, it will be fun to turn up at the ceremony and spend time with people that we haven't seen for a while. I very rarely really feel like part of the science fiction community, and it will be unusual and interesting to be right in the thick of it for a few days.

Revenge in books is mostly wish-fulfillment. That's fine, but not what I wanted to do in Solitaire. I think we'd like to believe that we can get even when bad things happen to us, but usually it doesn't work out that way. Just think about the language—we want to get "even" with the people who have hurt us. But that's not possible. If someone damages me or the people I love, how can I make that even? How can there be a balance for that? At the end of it all, Jackal has to live with what's happened, and so do we. I do think she's mad at her parents, at Ko, sometimes at the whole damn world. But the book isn't about someone being bitter. I said in the previous question that Jackal behaves the way I would like to, and that's also true for what we're talking about here—I hope that when my foundation drops out from under me in one of the several inevitable ways, I will find a way through it rather than being swallowed up. Sometimes the things I write about are a kind of rehearsal.

We can disagree about proper applications of the word "love." It's the word I meant to use, and I think Jackal does love Neill, although not the way she loves Snow, or her parents, or the Ko greenbelt, or the feeling of being a Hope, or any of the other degrees of attachment and vulnerability possible along this particular emotional spectrum. It's a shame to make one poor little word do so much work, but there it is. Your mileage may vary.

They do drink a lot, don't they? (grin). I wonder where they get that from.

Cheers.

#22
February 25, 2003
From: Lindsey Main, beanmain@yahoo.com

Just some ice water...had a bonfire in the snow last night...a break-up party for a friend... too much schnapps in the Swiss Miss.

I was wondering about a couple of things. In question #9, you mentioned your interest in sign language. Did you start that program? Is it really good? And, have you ever seen the movie, Children of a Lesser God? I loved that movie— when she describes the sound of the ocean—when she screamed, "Hear my voice", I was bawling my eyes out. That movie made me want to learn sign language. And for a year I had a crush on Marlee Matlin (sp?)...I was thirteen. I never did get around to learning it though. I know the alphabet and I used to know how to count. But that's all. If it had been there when I was in school, I probably would have taken it instead of french.

In SOLITAIRE, Scully's aftershock behind the bar made me think of seizures. I've never seen a real one. Have you? I have JME and have had plenty of seizures (haven't had one in 9 yrs and no more zombie meds either)...Anyway, friends and classmates would tell me what I looked like when I was having one. When Scully looked like he was going to reach out, when he made the nasty strangled sound and his eyes rolled back...that whole scene (except that his body was relaxed during the aftershock), was scary for me to read because, in a weird way, it was as if I hit play on the vcr and there I was seizing in front of myself. What Jackal does for Scully, other people have done for me...move stuff out of the way etc., etc. So, have you seen a seizure? Have you ever had to move stuff out of the way for someone? Just curious.

Thanks for taking the time to answer yet another one of my questions,
Lindsey

I enjoy your questions, it's nice to have an extended conversation.

I did start my class and I love it. Love love love. I study at ASLIS, the American Sign Language & Interpreting School of Seattle. It turns out that many students in my class moved to Seattle specifically to study at the school, and that kind of commitment makes for a pretty tight bonding experience. It's a great place to be if one is serious about ASL. Classes are small (and will get smaller next year, since some people take class as a foreign language credit for the University of Washington, and won't be staying for the full program). We get a lot of teacher attention (also known as nowhere to run, nowhere to hide...) There's a big emphasis on community involvement and learning about Deaf culture. It's focused and intense and treats us like grownups, all of which work well for me in a learning situation.

I have seen Children of a Lesser God 2 or 3 times and really admire Marlee Matlin's work. I love the scene in which she dances, feeling the music. I recently saw a repeat of an episode of The Practice that she did in 2000, in which she played a woman on trial for killing the man who murdered her daughter. There was an amazing scene between Matlin and Camryn Manheim (side note, Camryn Manheim rocks)—they have an argument in ASL and as it heats up, Manheim stops voicing, and there's a good 60-90 seconds of (silent) ASL between two very pissed-off people. No subtitles for the ASL-impaired; either the viewer keeps up or she doesn't. It was exciting to watch, and very powerful.

I don't believe I've ever witnessed a seizure—I'm guessing the images and notions I have mostly come from books and movies/TV. I'm glad you don't have to make a daily choice between seizing and zombification—that sounds pretty unhappy either way. This is the first time I've really thought about the fact that people who experience seizures might not know what one is like (what they look like, or how people react). I imagine it's unsettling to know something about yourself only from others' perceptions, especially if the people around you are afraid. I hope your friends and classmates were sensible, although so much of that depends on our particular socialization ("bodies are icky and illness is embarrassing and what if I do the wrong thing?" versus "bodies are part of the package, they get wacky or hurt sometimes, and we just have to do what we think is best to help"). So few of us are trained how to approach new and urgent situations, and how to trust ourselves in action. Specialized knowledge is good, but damn, there's no substitute for common sense and the willingness to take some responsibility. Jackal behaves the way I hope I would: and now that I'm thinking about this, I realize that my next book looks at this issue (how people behave in crisis) more intentionally. Hmm. I wonder how many little moments in Solitaire reflect themes or ideas that are important to me but still subterranean, that I will explore in future books, maybe forever.